Shopping With Pirates

Two Fridays ago, I took The Pirates shopping. Usually when we do this, it's for something cool like a bicycle, or walkie talkies, or games for the Wii. And they are quite enthusiastic.

However, this time there were many groans and much dragging of feet. Because we were clothes shopping. And not just any clothes... we were looking for suits.

You see, The Pirates were conveyed the honor of being invited to be Congressional Pages on the floor of the Tennessee legislature. Their mom invited me to join them for that day. I couldn't since that was right when I'd planned my trip to Missouri (my Hanna Time). But I requested the privilege of getting their clothes for the day.

(side note: these two are growing like bad weeds and their dress suits were more than a wee bit snug.)

I should have known something was up the way my dear friend chuckled...

Pirate 1 is 12 and a HALF (must not forget the half) and is slim built size 12. He also isn't very concerned with clothes... at least with dress clothes. Any color is fine as long as it is khaki or blue.

Pirate 2 is 10 and a QUARTER (not just 10) and is an athletic built size 12. He on the other hand is the future cover dude of GQ magazine. This young man is not afraid of color... in his shirts. Pants must be black.

Silly me... I thought we'd just be-bop into Target at 4pm and come out with spiffy looking boys. HA!

There are pitiful few dress clothes in the sizes of 12 and 14. One would think with Easter only 2 weeks away there would be plenty to chose from. And one would be thinking wrongly.

Let the boy torture begin.

We started out looking for a shirt, figuring we could build the outfit around that. Their Mom and I started looking thru the shirts and as we pulled out ones to try... there were no boys around to try them on. Found them over in the skateboarder shirts. Pirate 2 starts to get interested and is soon rooting thru the shirt selection. Pirate 1 slid over to hide in the greeting cards, from where he is promptly retrieved and told to find a shirt. After a good 30 minutes of trying various combinations and a check in the shoe department, we take the few (very few) approved selections and check out.

Next stop -- Dillards. I like Dillards. I had great hopes for Dillards.

I was hugely disappointed.

First, their selection in the 12 & 14 sizes was just a limited as Target. Well, they did have a nice tie selection. Second, the only clerk working the floor in boys was an idiot. She didn't know her department and really didn't seem to want to figure anything out.

And at this point, we had pirates in rebellion. Oh they do not like having the fit of their pants checked!

Tough.

Again, I take the very few things we found and head to the check out.

Next stop -- Belks. This is not one of my favorite stores but I'm starting to get desperate! Once in the boys department I remembered why they aren't my favorite store - the selection was the worst yet. However, they were having a HUGE sale on dress jackets. And thank you... there was a navy blue one that fit Pirate 1 and a black one that fit Pirate 2. Score!! Now we wait in line for 10 minutes at the only open check out...

Before Belks, we swung into a shoe shop that hereto before had been a good place to get these two boys shoes. Not any more. The Pirates are at the awkward between child and adult sizes and there was nothing to be found.

By now, we are ALL melting. Feet are tired, nerves are frayed. A quick run thru of our purchases showed we still had not found shoes for either boys and Pirate 1 still didn't have slacks.

So we head across the road to Kohls. Nada for shoes. But we did find the slacks and belt.

Our one last hope was Payless Shoes. And beauty was, it was located next door to the movie theater where we were going to see the 8:15 pm showing of "Alice In Wonderland".

I head in with what were now two walking attitudes. We were met by a bright-eyed clerk who asked if we needed help. I pointed to the slumping boys and said "I need some dress casual shoes for these two." She briskly led us the proper section and soon both boys were trying on shoes. The attitudes didn't faze her at all. They each found a pair - and on sale too - that they liked! YES!!!

I thanked the lady for her patience and help. She smiled and said, "I have 2 boys - 10 and 13". I laughed and said "10 and 12".

(As the line from "Sleepless in Seattle goes:

[at airport watching Jonah be obnoxious]
Sam: "He's 10".
Victoria: "He's good at it.")

We JUST made our movie...

You know, these boys owe their mom a really nice Mother's Day.

In fact, every male out there owes their mom a really nice Mother's Day; because as my friend said, "Welcome to my life!"


However... as you can see from this photo, it was worth the effort. Aren't they a handsome pair of young men!?